I Love My Women

What most people wont teach you about PU is that its not ALL about getting ass, or getting girls, or even getting into relationships. Its not completely about building a skillset or perfecting your game.

PU is about balance.

Hard as it is to explain, possibly even harder to see, its always about finding a balance. And in the simplest sense, its about finding a balance in your life. A balance between molding your self into the person you want to be(a better description would be to grow) and building the type of lifestyle that you want for yourself.

But hey, I'm not going to preach to you. I know most guys come here solely to get laid. In actuality, this may not be all that they truly want, but this is where many guys set goals. So if youre wondering, "Hey, is NVP ever gonna explain to me how I can pull girls with this?" yes, yes I am. Just keep in mind, this isnt for everyone. Only for those who can accept it.

So I lied when I said Im not gonna preach to you, lol, but hell, learn a little bit about life that will lead you to success wherever you take it while learning how to pick up a woman at the same time.

I know alot of guys look up to "our" (as in the community's) gurus. In all fairness, though it may appear otherwise, I do the same. I can appreciate the ability of the guys who are the top. I can identify with Gunwitch. I can understand Juggler. I can appreciate Mystery. These and others have contributed alot to the community. And theres the age old argument, who's material is the best? I know, I know, but truth be told, the best material is simply what you can identify with. Solid material is solid. While they preach from different standpoints, theres many different ways to effectively paint the same picture.

But one reason I hold disdain for many "gurus" is that some teach that, "This is EVERYTHING that makes me successful with women. Follow this and you can become just as successful as I am." And not to pick on him, but I have to use Mystery as an example. Yeah you have the M3 model, and VAH, and all the workshops that he teaches, but dont think that he "teaches" everything that makes him successful. If you only master everything in his methodology, his material, his structure, and mimic his implementation, you'll never be as successful as he is nor as successful as you could be.

Mystery, Gunwitch, Juggler, etc... theyve all spent years... YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS... mastering some principles that you cant copy with material and structure alone. These guys have spent years simply learning to be comfortable around women. If you never make TRULY being comfortable with and around women a priority, you will never see the full potential of MM or any other method or material for that matter. It simply cant happen other than by choice or accident.

With that said, I'd like to tell you something about me that makes me successful(I know, I cant compete the with guys I mentioned, lol, but theyve got thousands of hours of field experience over me). Something that defines me long before I even begin an interaction, or isolate the chick, or even long after the close.

A major element in my success with women is that I love my women. I know youre thinking to yourself "this guy practices and teaches other guys how to get into bed with women, who is he to tell me I need to love women?"

Lol.

Im not saying Im in love with every chick I meet, or even that I love every woman that I keep around longer than one night. Im saying that in general, I love women. No hidden motives, no misleading guises, I honestly love women. I appreciate them, their physical beauty, their personalities, their quirks, their strong points and their flaws alike. And in this game, this is one of the few areas where balance plays little influence. To get really good, youre either going have to throroughly despise women because of their many flaws, or deeply love women in spite of them.

And Im not going to tell you or teaching you to hate women. Sure, being misogynistic can help you be a good player at times and help you find ways to take advantage of situations that will get a woman in bed. But it cant help you be a good leader at all. You can go through life lying to and misleading women, or punishing them for every flaw they have, or taking from them whatever it is you want. Honest truth, alot of women will accept it. But living like that is empty for most guys. You dont have to go that route to get girls if you dont want to.

And at the same time, most women NEED to be led. When it comes to men, sex, and relationships, women in general simply do not have it in themselves to lead an interaction in a manner that will benefit not only herself, but give the two of you what you want.

Many people debate over who's responsibility it is to lead. Alot of guys say that its not their job to take responsibility for her happiness. And thats true, you're only as responsible as you choose to be. But most guys want better quality and quantity in their choice of women. And again, if you want to step into the big leagues, to be good, youre going to have take alot of that responsibility away from her. You truly have to step up and lead. But you're only responsible as long as she follows.

If she constantly keeps things from moving the direction youre trying to take them and she's unhappy, you simply cant be held accountable for that. You cant cater to every woman who's too stubborn to do whats best for her. Women sabatoge themselves alot of the time, and thats not your fault. Now when YOU are the one who messes it up, theres no one to blame but you, and thats fine. You have to be comfortable with that. Its a part of being a great guy. Not necessarily a great PUA, but being a great and sincere person can help in making you a better pick-up artist.

I have women tell me how great I am. They tell me I'm wonderful. How I make such a difference in their life. How they're better off because they've met me. How theres nothing that makes them happier. My women love me. And if I never banged a new chick again, I wouldnt trade the feelings I get from pleasing my women and them pleasing me.

And I cant make anyone want this, but for me, its not ALWAYS about some ass. Sure I love some no strings attached fun at times just like any other guy. Then, at times, I want other things that women have to offer as well. And I know when you get better with women, sometimes its hard to view them as more than just cheap sex. I've been there. But at the same time, some women can give you great sex AND be great friends and turn into great relationships, and be great loves of your life. And there are times when this can make me 10 times happier than the hottest, or the freakiest, or the "whatever-it-is-iest that you can think of" girl can make me.

Despite what it may sound like, I am completely against supplication. The clearest way I can put that is, never do anything for a woman just because you think it will get you somewhere, or make her like you, or get her in bed with you. Thats not where I'm gpomg at all.

And I'm not talking in the realm of PU, but in how you treat women, and the things that you'll do for them, especially regardless of how they treat you. I wont sacrifice my dignity to get laid. I wont lose my self-respect just to make a girl happy to get her in bed. And that in itself is part of loving women. I have too much respect for myself to do that, sure. But I KNOW that women dont need that, its unhealthy for the both of us, and I cant lead them in the right direction by doing so.

You'd probably think that having beliefs like this would lead to having oneitis more often. But the exact opposite is true. I dont want anything from these women. Im not looking to take anything. Im not trying "to get" sex. Its more along the lines of giving. All I do is give give give. I give them something to smile about, to enjoy. I make things fun and interesting for them. I appreciate them and show them how to appreciate themselves. I add nothing but quality to their lives. And in asking nothing in return, they respond in kind.

They add more to my life. They give to me. They WANT to make me happy and do for me what I do for them. And thats in the nature of a woman who's being led. To follow in like fashion. And yes, this translates into sex. Alot of times, sex isnt something I have to convince a girl to give. Its something that the both of us share. I'm a sexual person, I'm comfortable with that, and she accepts it that plainly.

At the same time, I make her feel comfortable with being a sexual person, because she is. Women want to be accepted and want to be sexual at the same time, so I make that ok for her, which leads to her WANTING sex. Its not some goal that Im trying to get to, its a natural progression of the interaction between us.

Granted, I couldnt be so successful with women without the PU skills. But thats the way it works, everything has its place. But you cant focus only on the skills and never build any of the qualities that the skills emulate and hope to have the level of satisfaction that you want. Theres simply more to it than JUST the material. And so many guys run away from this because they're looking for a quick fix, they want the magic bullet. And you need to hear this,

There is none.

The material is what it is. It demonstrates whatever trait or principle it was designed to as the event arises or it handles the logistics of a situation. And then you need more than that to fill in the gaps that the material doesnt cover. And that goes back to my first point about balance.

Although I wish I could, I cant teach a guy to love women. Its a choice, a process, a lifestyle, that one person really cant train another to do. You have to choose that, work towards it, and cultivate it yourself. In the same manner that Juggler or Mystery cant "teach" how to be comfortable with women, its something you have to build.


Something just for yall right here...

I love my women, and they love me. And that leads me to more opportunity with more women than I have the time for.

I try never to let any situation, any woman, or anything about her take away from how comfortable I am with women(her), how comfortable I am with being sexual, and how comfortable I am with myself.

Even more, I lead women where I want to go, but not just to get what I want, but to the benefit of us both. And none of this could I do if I didnt truly appreciate women.


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Being successful with women is not about the lines you recite or the moves you make. Any loser can trick a woman into sleeping with him. That doesn't keep him from being a loser.

Its about who you are and where your focus is, not what you do. If you're comfortable with yourself, comfortable with women, and comfortable with being sexual, you ARE the kind of guy that is successful with women.

NVP

Challenging a woman... Its necessary to be Great With Women

et me say, I'm not the the greatest PUA ever. Im no mPUA or any kind of guru. I've met guys who don't know what mASF is and have never heard of a PUA who are better with women than I am.

That said, I've slept with plenty of women. Plenty of women have been in love with me, infatuated with me, excited or intrigued or engaged by me. Though I''m not the best, I have success with women. Thank yall for being so interested, lol.

It appears to me that often in this Community, we tend to put too much emphasis on "what to do" with women, when we should be putting most of our emphasis on "who we are" and where our focus is.

I know, for almost every guy on the planet, it sounds SOOOO great to hear that you can get pull girls using a bunch of lines. Some of you have likely tried Speed Seduction. Its captivating to think that you can seduce a woman with just a handful of patterns. There are eleventy(lol) different methods out there and just as many gurus for learning how to seduce a woman. Theres even the advice that people in general give you. "Be yourself, be nice , be courteous, be a gentleman..." so on and so forth. There are so many options to choose when it comes to how you should approach women.

Ill tell you this, no matter what lines, patterns, methods/gurus, advice you use to try to attract women into your life, you can only "do" so much. At some point, who you are is going to show through. Whether that be 1st class chump, or the smoothest player around, who you are is going to begin to have much more control over what you do than your conscious mind can cover.

You can use all the material in the world, best routines and all, and even if you're successful with that, you'll only become dependent on the material to work for you.

Now, dont get me wrong, there are plenty of things you can DO that can begin to change who you are. You can be sexual with women, and this in turn will give you opportunity to be more comfortable with being sexual. And that will lead to you making women feel more comfortable with you. Because women want a man who's not afraid of his sexuality, who's not afraid to express it around women, and who wants her in a sexual way.

Take that as a hint.

But since we're on the subject of what we can DO, I'll get to my point. A woman by nature(as in being trained by society) will try to impose her will on any man at any given time. She's going to ask you to buy her drinks, buy her dinner, take her places, do favors for her, listen to all her problems... basically, she's going to ask you to drop your masculinity for awhile and serve her.

In and of themselves, these things aren't necessarily bad. The problem is that most men have nothing going for themselves to attract a woman other than attempting to BUY her affection or sex with gifts and favors. We call that supplication. Its a definite no.

I know alot of you guys are brand new to pick up. I know even more of you are probably struggling or have always struggled with women. I know many of you have had little to no success with women. Thats fine. But I'm assuming since you've been here, you've been reading up, and doing a few approaches, maybe even have some basic skill when it comes to interacting with women.

And maybe I'm taking it for granted that you're in the field approaching often, it can be difficult at first. Doesn't matter. I'm sure you know women, hell you have a sister, a mom, a cousin, classmates, co-workers, something, so no one has any excuse why they cant do what I'm about to tell you.

If you cant tell a woman no and then offer something that YOU want her to have, then you cant expect to sleep with a woman who tells you she wants a relationship(or money, or dinner, or dates, or a friend or whatever).

Plain and simple, YOU HAVE TO CHALLENGE WOMEN. If you're a pushover, if you supplicate, if you do all those things I listed earlier, if you give her only what she asks for and not what YOU want(and thats really what women want, a man that takes what he wants), then you will NEVER be successful with women.

I know the Community has a tendency to stress success with women as lays, but im not that shallow. I mean in the grander scheme of things, getting a gf, laying a girl, laying multiple women, having multiple relationships, having a woman that likes you for you and not what you can provide, or having women respect you in general. If you cant say no to the passing fickle whims that women have and follow up with telling her what YOU want her to have or hell, just what you want, success is impossible. Women simply do not respond to men who fall on their backs every time she says roll over.

So... what exactly do I want you to do to get this ingrained in your head?

I want you to tell 20 women, "No." I don't care if its your mom, your boss, your girlfriend(or wife, lol), whoever. And then, I want you to offer up a suggestion in return. And I want you to be a damn man about it. You don't have to be a jerk, or an ass, you can do it with a sense of humor. But what you wont do is do it timidly or be scared about it.

If a girl wants you to buy her a drink, tell her "No, but if she behaves you might give her a kiss on the cheek later."

If your mom asks you to help her with something, tell her "No, but ill get dad(or find you a boyfriend) to help you since I love you so much."

If a girl asks you for answers to a test or help with her homework tell her, "No, but if you cook me a nice dinner(or give me a nice back rub) I might let you be my study buddy(lol, yeah, i'm trying to set you up for some)."

Now I shouldn't have to spell everything out for you. I'm sure alot of you guys are smart. If the options I gave you don't fit a particular situation, then COME UP WITH SOMETHING ON YOUR OWN. And depending on the situation, you don't want to be inappropriate. If its your mom, obviously you don't wanna be an ass and definitely not sexual. If its your boss, don't "not do" anything that would get you fired. If its you're wife(lol), just tell her ass no over and over. Use a little sense.

And in case you didn't notice, in a couple of those examples, I did something very special. Sure, no woman will respect a man that is push over and does every single thing she asks and is always afraid to disagree. Sure, women want a man thats not afraid to say whats on his mind, go after what he wants, and take it when he wants it. But also, women VALUE a man when they have to invest in him. A woman thats not willing to do even small things for you, will probably not be willing to sleep with you. Offer women the opportunity to show compliance, and offer a reward if they do. And that offer of a reward doesn't have to always be verbalized.

If you can do this with 20 women, this alone, I promise that seducing a woman will eventually become second nature. In essence, being talented with women is simply being the type of guy that you honestly want to be, while at the same time, being decisive about what you want, making her feel comfortable about having sex with you, and her investing in you, whether that be time, attention, cooking, back rubs, sex, whatever.

And if you can do this, then you can progress to where you want to be with women.


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Being successful with women is not about the lines you recite or the moves you make. Any loser can trick a woman into sleeping with him. That doesn't keep him from being a loser.

Its about who you are and where your focus is, not what you do. If you're comfortable with yourself, comfortable with women, and comfortable with being sexual, you ARE the kind of guy that is successful with women.

NVP

The Secret To EVERY Top Guys Success

In this community, we have a tendency to idolize the guys with inhumane success with women. Thats cool, I'm not knocking it. Its just like basketball, or football, or anything else where talent can be compared and it can become competitive. The guys with success are idolized.

But in no other "field" have I seen where regardless of your background, your past, your handicaps in the same area, your demographic, your race, or even your age, the admirers can at some point(even in a relatively short amount of time) have success in comparison of the guys they look up to.

No 30 yr old, balding, out of shape white guy is going to be the next Michael Jordan. No guy living in his moms basement(no offense) with zero baseball experience, money, or connections is gonna turn into the next A. Rod. Its not gonna happen. But here, we have the opportunity, even the privilege, to pick apart the best of the best at what they do, make it a part of ourselves, and turn our lives into whatever it is we want. And compared to the time MJ took just practicing his jump shot, and the time A.Rod spent swinging his bat, the time we spend learning PU until we're successful is just a drop in the bucket.

And so its become a continual habit of guys in the community to pick apart guys that are better than themselves, learn what makes them tick, and apply it to themselves to reach the same level.

Every guy wants to be Gunwitch. Every guy wants to be Mystery. Every guy wants to be Juggler. And to a lesser extent, guys want to be Style or Tyler Durden(other than Style being rediculously rich, I cant understand why guys would want to copy "can I get a female opinion on something"). With as much success as theyve had, I'll tell you now, I want to be all those guys rolled up into one(not in a gay way, lol).

But listen, I dont care if you're a "Guru" all the way down to clueless newb or worse, the things that make the greats great are the same things that make the chumps, well, chumps.

In what the PUAs give advice on, in what we get from our field experience, in what we see in naturals and others who have success, there are three categories that everything we learn about PU fall under. When it comes to women, they define how successful you are and how successful you can be, as well as how much of a chump you are and how long you will stay that way. If you take any one of these away from me, or even Razorjack, Gunwitch, Mystery, Juggler, Woodhaven, Dimitri(and I mention them for their methods), or anyone else, they're gonna be chumps just like the guys out there that we as a community tend to look down upon. I dont care what kind of guru or teacher you are, your own method, regardless of how many LRs it generates, wont get you girls without these things.

The three principles that everything we learn falls under are this: being comfortable with women, being comfortable with being sexual, and being comfortable with yourself.

I dont care how many routines you stack, how many lines you memorize, how much you read on good BL, how much you practice kino, or how many approaches you do every day. If what you're doing isn't adding to one of these three categories, then you're wasting your time and your not going to get any better until you start doing something else.

You can memorize every stage of MM, quote it word for word, go into the field and watch Mystery himself in action, point out what he's doing and never be able to have even a measurable amount of success if you're lacking in even one of those areas. If you're not comfortable being sexual, I promise, no matter what routine you throw at her, she's never going to go into a sexual state. How is she gonna want sex with a guy who doesn't even feel like being sexual is normal. I don care if you have a million lines to carry the convo to bed, the minute you run out or stop talking(or even mid sentence), something is going to give. You cant fake 100% of everything 100% of the time. You cant fill in all the blanks that your material doesnt cover. Its not gonna happen.

Guys think that if they fill their game with bells and whistles(material, peacocking, c/f, etc.) and never get their issues solved, that they can meet, lay, and keep the chicks in life that they really want. I'm telling you that no matter how much you change your actions, if you're not building those three principles at the same time, you'll never have more than surface success. For example, approach artists. I shouldn't even have to go further.

This stuff should actually be a given. Guys post on being "On" and being on autopilot, we sit here and pick apart Guru after Guru to see what makes him great, we question every guy that posts a LR to figure out what made it happen. Hell, if you haven't figured out that the most important part of what we do is comfort, then it doesn't matter what they tell you or what you learn from them. You wont have near as much success as them doing the same exact thing.

And when I say comfort, Im not talking about as part of rapport. Thats easy. Childs play game. What guy cant build a little comfort with a chick? I'm talking about the hard part, the ability for you to be completely comfortable yourself. Comfortable around women, comfortable enough to have a conversation with a woman, comfortable when the conversation dies, comfortable when she's shit testing you to hell and back and even when she's not, comfortable whether you're just caressing her or dragging her to the bed, comfortable when she up and admits she wants to fuck, or comfortable when she never even gives you a hint.

This is what it boils down to. Being comfortable. In your own skin. Being comfortable enough to not worry so much about making the right moves, thats the right move. Being comfortable with women, with being sexual, and with yourself. And it doesn't happen over night. Yes it takes alot work. You need field experience. You need to come here and read. You need to work on your frame. You need to do alot of things, but if you're spending time doing something thats not adding to those levels of comfort, you're wasting time, stagnating, and probably wondering why "this isn't working" or "I cant get better."

You hear how guys talk about, "I said everything right, i made all the right moves, but still got blown out." Saying everything right and making all the right moves aren't even close to everything you need to get the girl(even more, arent always necessary), especially when you're looking to net new girls all the time. HOW did you say everything that you said, HOW did you do everything that you did? Theres tons of girls that only need ONE HINT of a lack of comfort in those three areas before your shit is a wrap.

And this is the real inner game we search for as we get better at PU. This is the solid foundation that puts all our material together for us so that when we hit the field, "I'm on." And I'm not expecting every guy to have this handled. I dont have those areas mastered myself, but I know what I'm doing, I know where I need to work, and I'm working on improving those every time im doing anything. But if you aren't making progress in those areas, then you aren't making progress.

Again, guys come into the community wondering why they cant get laid, why their routines aren't working, why they get blown out by AMOGS, why loser AFCs have more women than them, but then, they aren't even comfortable enough being around women to JUST HAVE A NORMAL CONVERSATION. LOL, its a shame. And then when guys tell them they need to just learn how to sit there and talk to a girl about any random bs, they question the advice and wonder how that's going to help them get laid. If you're not comfortable enough with yourself and with women to have a normal conversation, you're definitely not going to have what it takes to get her into bed with you or more. Not gonna happen.

Guys get LJBFed by a girl and talk about how special she is, how different she is, how its not oneitis. We tell them to GFTOW and we're the bad guys. There must be something they can say/do to change her mind. LOL. What advice can we give you when a girl see's its obvious that you're not even remotely aware of the principles I'm talking about. You need to be working one being comfortable in general before you start worrying about what to do with a specific girl that basically said you cant have her. We know it, she knows it, and you're the only one who thinks the flaw is in the method/material/strategy, lol. Come on now.

We argue about why canned material doesn't work and why it does. Why direct/indirect is better. Why natural game is the only way to go. Other than the fact that at some point, you have to go direct(doesnt matter how you open cuz openers dont get you laid), none of that shit makes any difference. What matters is that nothing you say or do should take away from those three qualities. Nothing you say or do should ever hint a lack of any one of those qualities. I'm not saying that you have to be perfect every time, but what I'm saying is, the stronger you are in those areas, the less you "need" your material to work for you because you're going to be doing so many other things that send the right signals and say the right things that it hardly matters what you say.

Call it on. Call it tight inner game. Call it great method. Call it whatever you want when you see it, but it starts with those three. With everything we have here, guys can and do get better. But imagine how much time guys waste(myself included) looking for the right method, or great lines, or material or anything else when they dont even have these basic principles covered or even just im mind.

I've read and heard tons of stuff on fixing your inner game issues. And I also hear as well as provide the same old arguments from time to time. How will this make me better? How will this get me laid? How does this really help my inner game? Look at you're own experience. From you're first understanding of this community(or even further back to your first interest in women) until now. If you haven't grown in your success, theres money on the table saying you haven't grown in any of those areas. And for the guys who's lives have taken 360's, everything theyve done to get better can be summed up into one(or all) of those areas.

You can even be more specific. When your level of success with women rises or falls or just levels out, you were gaining or losing or simply not improving your level of comfort. Honestly, look back. I can see in myself the same thing.

"Why you dont suck at PU, YOU SUCK AT LIFE!" doesn't have anything to do with the idea that having your life together makes women attracted to you. There are all kinds of guys with money, expensive cars, great jobs, and huge houses dont get laid. There are tons of guys in debt, walking, jobless, and staying with their mom that do. But if you need to change anyone of those situations to feel more comfortable with yourself, its either going to take you changing your situation or changing the way you look at life before you can be successful with women in the long run.

Its not the money or the materials that make you or break you. Its you. Its how much you let that shit matter when you do or dont have it that can make you or break you. Its always about you. Women are always about you. Success is always about you. And you can make all that happen when you have your head together.

There are plenty of people who are going to teach you techniques, routines, lines, and methods to use to get laid. Thats fine, most guys who come here are going to need alot of that stuff. Not many guys are going to show you the best way to make use of all of that or how not to really rely on it. This is what makes the guys who a great at what they do, great at what they do.

I once told a guy that this these three simple things are the entire premise for being good with women, just not in so many words. And the way I put it, I dont think I could've made it simpler.

Damn near word for word:

"I've found that anything productive that we can learn in this community almost always fall under these three principles. Being comfortable with women, being comfortable with being sexual, and being comfortable with yourself. If you lack anyone of those, hell if me, or ijjjji, or TD, Mystery, or Gunwitch lack anyone of those, success with women isn't gonna happen.

But even more than that, they all feed off of each other. If you're lacking in one department, you can feel like you're not successful in life. Everything you do in regards to learning PU and getting good with women should fall under improving one of those three categories. If its not, then its time to start adding more to what you're doing or doing something else. Even in your life outside of this community, if your job, your school, your hobbies, your general life, if its not adding to how comfortable you are with yourself(including being happy), then you need to start making some changes.

You want the path to inner game? There you go. I've opened the doors for you, all you gotta do is walk the walk. And its not easy. Im not a master of having my life together. But I've found as long as I'm making progress in what I want to be doing, I'm far happier than any HB10 or any handful of money can make me. Your real inner-game."

Your real inner-game.

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Being successful with women is not about the lines you recite or the moves you make. Any loser can trick a woman into sleeping with him. That doesn't keep him from being a loser.

Its about who you are and where your focus is, not what you do. If youre comfortable with yourself, comfortable with women, and comfortable with being sexual, you ARE the kind of guy that is successful with women.

NVP